Sir Imp's Herald - July 2019 - Issue #1
Allow me to introduce myself. I am Sir Impius Lucifius Cornelius Nox III, though my title is irrelevant while I am a denizen of this “material” plane. While the ever-roaring flames of the world below were pleasant enough, I felt distant from my peers… I couldn’t relate to them despite my best efforts. I desperately longed for the finer things in afterlife.
It wasn’t until I met the humans at Dirt Cheap Dungeons that my uniquely exquisite style was realized. They gifted me a monocle and suggested I grow out my mustache, and while they are among some of the strangest mortals I’ve ever encountered, they accept me for who I am.
Well, for the most part.
You see, it is still within my nature to fill each available moment of their lives with mayhem. I reveled in every opportunity to wreak havoc on them, as per my customs, to demonstrate my appreciation. I fear that these intentions were misinterpreted, for the DCD mortals have magically bound me to the task of maintaining their monthly newsletter in an attempt to “reign me in.” Unless the spell is somehow nullified, I expect that I will be observing, recording, and translating their antics into this convenient form for you to view until I outlive them all. Until then, I shall do my best to bring a little class into your monthly DCD update. Keep reading… it all begins below.
What Is This So-Called “Production Phase?”
I, Sir Imp, have been carefully observing the goings-on at Dirt Cheap Dungeon Headquarters for the past month. I have noticed our social media moderator using the term “production phase” as it pertains to the mass production of their modular dungeon wall sets, tokens, AOE markers, and more. I would like to formally elaborate this.
If you’ve been following their progress, you are aware that the Dirt Cheap Dungeons Guild (DCDG) has delayed the delivery of said goods due to a nearby Facebook HQ requiring nearly all the electricians from our humble area to be unavailable for months on end. This prohibited them from making the electrical upgrades necessary for mass production.
My captors- pardon me… my coworkers- utilized this time to improve their prototypes. Evidently, it is now my job to inform you of these improvements, and I shall do so below. But I digress; when the DCDG declare themselves to be in the “production phase,” what they are conveying is that the electrical upgrades have been completed, their machines are running, and your items are being forged.
This means that until all Kickstarter orders and Pre-orders are fulfilled in August, their inventory is limited to backers.
Nevertheless, DCD is still accepting emails regarding collaboration, sponsorship, and donations to charitable organizations (ugh, writing this is painfully non-evil), and encourage you to still reach out before August if you are interested.
#1 – Area of Effect Markers
Fewer projects have required more time, calculation, play-testing, and collaboration among the DCDG members than their new AOE markers. Believe me, their incessant back-and-forth about optimizing these seemingly simple devices, as well as the recruitment of a new Junior Engineer, has truly paid off.
With portability being of utmost importance to the DCDG, the phase-1 AOE rings as shown on their Kickstarter in Fall 2018 didn’t sit right with them. The rings indicating larger spell effects were bulky and inefficient to make, which means more plastic waste- a detriment the DCDG has worked to avoid since their origins. Personally, I believe the more plastic waste the better. This planet’s climate is far too stable for my tastes, anyway. Additionally, they didn’t allow for cube or cone effects to be easily calculated… but our new AOE set will.
The new AOE markers will now arrive to you disassembled for minimal storage, but with clear indicators as to which pieces go together. The connector pieces which fasten the AOE markers together are intuitive and ergonomic, even for those of us with claws.
Worried about these AOE markers interfering with your minis on the grid? Not to fear- these fancy shmancy connector pieces also act as feet elevating them from table, allowing the edges of your mini’s bases to slide right underneath.
#2 – The Cursed Echoes
It was highly ambitious for a team of engineers, several local illustrators and one writer to take on the task of writing and publishing an entire adventuring module, from start to finish, in less than a year… and yet, here they are.
The Cursed Echoes is a 5e compatible quest for a party of 4-6 brave (or foolish) adventurers. It is compatible with all Dirt Cheap Dungeons modular wall sets, tokens, and other accessories, though it can also be played with any or none of these fripperies.
Within its pages, your party will experience time travel, mer-dwarves, dragons, chicken-tossing, mummies, espionage, scandal, and more… all beginning in the strange and perpetually windy kingdom of Farwynd.
DCD’s Kickstarter backers, as well as their pre-order patrons, will recieve one PDF copy of this whirlwind adventure. A hardcover copy of The Cursed Echoes will be released later in the year for those interested in allowing this eerie tale to reside in their homes.
– art cred: Craig Smoothy –
#3 – A Bag for the Dapperest of GM’s
When the DCDG first invested in messenger bags to accompany their original products, even going so far as to feature them in their first commercial, they were disappointed to find that the bags had a weakness… as do we all. For me, it’s cigars. For those hundreds of bags, it was a faulty seam. The bag-maker they had ordered from was unable to rectify the problem, and so, they turned to another merchant altogether and found a new bag- one that is stronger, larger, and dare I say, classier. *strokes mustache*
If you received one of Dirt Cheap Dungeons’ earlier bags and its structural integrity is compromised, please feel at liberty to reach out to us on social media for a new one.
Noel and Jason do WA State Summer Con
From June 15-16, DCDG’s Jason (Junior Engineer, pictured above) and Noel(PR Administrator, not pictured/not the robot) were demonstrating DCD’s pieces in action at Washington State Summer Con. Jason has been the lead designer behind the AOE markers, and as such, they found themself answering the questions of many curious adventurers and showcasing the durability and intuitiveness of the AOE sets.
According to Noel and Jason, the most (sickeningly) heartwarming part of attending this con was the plethora of young adventurers, many never having played a Tabletop RPG before, instinctively playing with the walls, tokens, and AOE markers. This often encouraged their guardians to get a little curious themselves and join in on the fun.
The DCDG highly recommends experiencing the durability and eloquenceof their products for yourself by attending a con nearest to you; especially if you’re on the fence about ordering from them. If you do visit their booth, they will likely encourage you and even your most destructive party member to stay and play for a while.
You can see DCD’s soonest upcoming conventions below, with more in the works.
Oregon Convention Center
September 13-15, 2019
Alliant Energy Energy Center
October 31- November 3, 2019
Until next month, my friends. Thank you for reading, and please, if you come across a spellbook, enchanted scroll, or a vision from a deity that promises the breakage of this bond I'm under, send it my way.
Stay dapper, Dungeoneers.